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Showing posts with the label When-Joy-Feels-Like-a-Lie

The myth of being yourself--- the identity we create vs. the one we live

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The Myth of “Being Yourself”: The Identity We Create vs. the One We Live      “Just be yourself.” It’s one of the most comforting lies we’re told. Not because it’s cruel—but because it assumes there is a single, stable “self” waiting patiently inside us, fully formed, untouched by fear, survival, or expectation. As if identity is something you discover, not something you negotiate with every single day. But what if “being yourself” is not a destination? What if it’s a contradiction? The Self We Create From the moment we become aware of being watched, we begin to edit. Psychology tells us this is normal. The human brain is wired for belonging. We learn quickly which versions of us are rewarded and which are quietly rejected. Smiles earn approval. Silence avoids conflict. Confidence hides insecurity. Over time, these adjustments harden into personality. Carl Jung called this the persona —the mask we wear to function in society. Not a lie, exactly, but not the whole tr...

When Joy Feels Like a Lie

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               "When Joy Feels Like a Lie" "Some parts hold. Others quietly shatter." The mirror reflects a face I do not recognize. It smiles, but the movement feels foreign, mechanical, rehearsed. The eyes glimmer with something I pretend is light, but behind the glimmer, there is nothing. Nothing that feels true. And I realize, painfully, that the world has never seen me as I am. They see the mask I wear, the performance of happiness, the polished fragments I allow to escape into the world. But beneath it, I am hollow, fractured, a collection of shadows that move independently, sometimes violently, against the semblance of joy I project. I remember the first time I noticed it — the realization that the smiles I offered were not joy, but armor. That laughter was never for me, but for them, the ones watching, judging, expecting. The mask became a habit, a ritual, a survival mechanism. Each morning, I pulled it on carefully, adjusting its fit over...