The myth of being yourself--- the identity we create vs. the one we live

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The Myth of “Being Yourself”: The Identity We Create vs. the One We Live      “Just be yourself.” It’s one of the most comforting lies we’re told. Not because it’s cruel—but because it assumes there is a single, stable “self” waiting patiently inside us, fully formed, untouched by fear, survival, or expectation. As if identity is something you discover, not something you negotiate with every single day. But what if “being yourself” is not a destination? What if it’s a contradiction? The Self We Create From the moment we become aware of being watched, we begin to edit. Psychology tells us this is normal. The human brain is wired for belonging. We learn quickly which versions of us are rewarded and which are quietly rejected. Smiles earn approval. Silence avoids conflict. Confidence hides insecurity. Over time, these adjustments harden into personality. Carl Jung called this the persona —the mask we wear to function in society. Not a lie, exactly, but not the whole tr...
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A Letter to my Younger self.

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                A Letter to my younger self

Dear younger me, 

Even in the depths of pain, healing begin

If I could go back in time, I’d hold your tiny hands and whisper, 'You were never alone. God was always there, watching over you.' You are gentler than you know and stronger than you’ve ever believed — and that’s exactly what makes you so beautifully you. I know you are scared sometimes but you are braver than you realise. I know when you sobbed all night and there is no one to hug you other than  yourself.  I know those times when you feel like a burden on everyone ,when you feel like you didn't deserve anything , but it's not like that , the one who created everything , the sovereign of both worlds--- GOD has always loved you. 

You are not alone 

You’re never alone.

I  would sit beside you on those lonely nights and whisper that your tears won't go unnoticed -GOD is watching and he loves you .I know sometimes it get heavy from inside and suddenly you felt that you are not able to breathe properly , you got so much tensed about every single thing . You are that little innocent soul who thinks if anything happened to anyone it's just because of you. You held back your 'no' out of fear — fear that you’d be labeled selfish, unkind, or ungrateful. But deep down, you were just scared to choose yourself. . I know you got so tired to became a good person but reality is no one cares about your good side just one small mistake is enough to tell you about their upcoming behaviour to you .There is no harm in saying no. Let your own heart be the first one you heal. From there, love flows freely.

   

The lessons I learned 

Realized the hard way

 Patience is Strength

 Looking back, I see now that strength isn’t always loud. Sometimes it’s the quiet patience, the steady breath, the silent endurance. Patience is its own kind of power. As a child I often thought being patient meant being silent., being helpless, or simply waiting for things to change . Growing older taught me this: not everything unfolds in a moment. With sabr, outcomes often blossom more beautifully than they ever could in haste.When you meet life’s trials with patience, you discover a strength that doesn’t rush — it trusts. Not everything  you want will come immediately ---some blessings take time , and some struggles are meant to shape you before they leave you. Being patient doesn’t mean giving up; it means continuing to walk with hope, even when the road feels endless.Most importantly, patience is tied to faith. When you are patient, you are indirectly saying: “I trust GOD’s plan. I believe He knows when and how to give me what is best.” And that kind of faith gives your heart a strength nothing else can.

Your Worth is Not Defined by Others

One of the most freeing lessons I have learned is this: your worth is not defined by others.                  For a long time, I thought the opinions of people around me decided who I was. If they praised me, I felt valuable; if they criticized me, I felt small. But over time, I realized how dangerous it is to hand over your self-worth to people who often don’t even understand you.                                                   The truth is, people’s opinions change like seasons. Today they may admire you, tomorrow they may forget you, and sometimes they may even try to bring you down.If your value rises and falls with their words, you'll live chained to their storms. Your real worth comes from within — from your character, your honesty, your kindness, your resilience, and most importantly, from GOD who created you with perfection. He has honored every soul, and if GOD sees value in you, no one else’s judgement can erase that.When you release the need to be seen, you begin to see yourself clearly. Growth often happens in silence — not everyone will see it, but that doesn't make it any less real.

Reassurance for the Future

Even the deepest waters grow still

The future often feels uncertain. We worry about where life will take us, whether our dreams will come true, or if we will ever find the peace we are looking for. But one thing I want to remind myself is this: the future is not something to fear, it is something to embrace.
Reassurance for the future comes from faith.

 His plans are always wiser than our own. Even when the road feels dark, He already knows where it leads. That thought itself is a comfort: nothing is random, every step has meaning.
Perfection is an illusion. Progress is the real path to lasting change.I don’t need to have everything figured out right now. I just need to take one step at a time, believing that every small effort will lead me somewhere beautiful.And when the fear grows too loud, I whisper to my heart: “You are not alone. You are guided, you are protected, you are loved by the One who created you.” That reassurance is enough to calm any storm about the days ahead.

Gratitude

Some peace, some perspective

As I look back on — the lessons, the struggles, and the moments of acceptence — I feel an overwhelming sense of warmth. Grace for the experiences that shaped me, for the people who crossed my path, and most of all, for the strength that Allah placed in my heart even when I didn’t recognize it.
Gratitude is a reminder that no matter how imperfect life may seem, there is always something beautiful to hold on to. The smallest blessings — a kind word, a smile, a prayer answered in silence — are proof that we are never truly forgotten.
As I step forward, I choose hope — hope that tomorrow holds more light than shadow, more progress than pause, and more love than loss.May what’s meant for me unfold in its own perfect time and way.    I walk through the unknown, not with certainty, but with faith as my guide.And that is enough to keep walking forward, one step at a time. The pages are still turning, and the most beautiful chapters haven’t even been written yet.

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